For somebody supposedly trained to pick up on subtexts, I can sometimes be a tad slow about it. Thus, for example, although part of my brain was perfectly well aware aware that Kateri's discussion of marriage and its problems wasn't just a topic she picked at random, I wrote my entire reply to her without acknowledging that her feelings on the matter were rather more personal than "I guess this'll do for today's Topic Of General Interest". What's (even) less excusable is that even after she'd spelt that out for me, I proceeded to do exactly the same thing again.
Because this is a topic I feel strongly about, and I was angry about it, I fell into a trap that I normally pride myself on avoiding: the belief that the reason I hadn't changed anyone's mind was because my original argument hadn't been quite harsh, strident and tactless enough, and I had better rectify that ASAP. Which was, in view of the subject matter, somewhat ironic. I was up in arms about the wrongs done by ignoring the feelings of a group. In the process, I ignored the feelings of an individual.
Kateri, I was out of line, and I'm sorry. Regardless of how strongly I believe in what I said, I shouldn't have said it in the way I did. I hope life improves for you exceedingly soon, and if I wasn't living three thousand miles away, I'd be over there in a heartbeat to take them off your hands for a bit and to explain to Josh, with diagrams, precisely what he could do with his dirty socks.
Hey, I'm tickled that I "spelt" something ;)
I'm sorry I couldn't maintain a little more emotional distance from this. I think we've all learned something; I know I have.
I wanna see those diagrams ;)
Posted by: Kateri | Wednesday, April 12, 2006 at 01:26